No Kings Day: America’s Peaceful Protest vs. Trump’s Lonely Military Parade

The People vs. The Parade
Let’s talk numbers. The No Kings Day protests saw
massive turnouts in cities like Philadelphia, Chicago, Los Angeles, and New
York, where crowds waved signs reading "Not My King" and "Democracy
Over Dynasty." Meanwhile, Trump’s "I Love Me Some Military
Hardware" Parade in Washington, D.C., was about as well-attended as a
MAGA rally in downtown Manhattan, which is to say, not very.
The contrast was glorious. On one side, you had Jamie Raskin
in Philadelphia, delivering a barnburner of a speech about democracy while the
crowd cheered like they were at a Beyoncé concert. On the other, you had
Trump, unconsolably weeping in front of a half-empty bleacher section, looking
like a man who just realized his golden toilet had been repossessed.
The Faces Say It All
Trump’s face during his parade: A mix of confusion
and disappointment, like a kid who ordered a "big, beautiful military
parade" from Amazon and got a plastic army men set instead.
The crowd’s face listening to Raskin: Pure, unadulterated joy, like they’d just been told “student loans were canceled, and free tacos were on the way”.
Cops vs. Reality
Before the protests, some law enforcement officials (who
apparently get their intel from QAnon forums) warned of "potential
violence." Instead, what we got was people singing, chanting, dancing in
the streets, and waving flags—basically, the opposite of January 6th.
Meanwhile, in a tragic and darkly ironic twist, House
Speaker Melissa Hortman and her husband, Mark, were murdered earlier in the day—a
politically motivated act that underscored the real violence threatening
democracy, while the actual protests remained entirely peaceful.
The Takeaway
The No Kings Day protests proved two things:
1. Americans don’t want a monarch, unless it’s our
beloved Country legend, Dolly Parton (and even then, she’d probably
decline).
2. Trump’s military parade was about as popular as a
screen door on a submarine.
So here’s to democracy! Be it loud and messy, it is still
standing despite everything thrown at it so far.
And here’s to Trump’s parade: a sad, tank-filled
reminder that no amount of hardware can make up for a lack of love from
the people.
Long live the Republic! Down with kings!
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